Are you a "bad" mom?

An interesting question, one that, when I first read it on the Manic Mommies forum I got defensive thinking "me?, a bad mom, no!!" But then I read on about what they were talking about and it made sense (it has very little to do with being BAD, and more to do with following, or not following norms of what society thinks is GOOD or BAD). And to illustrate the point of being a "bad" mom, I would recommend that all you moms out there read this http://badladies.blogspot.com/2009/06/bad-mother-manifesto.html It really touched me and I think speaks a lot of truth. So anyway, back to Mackenzie screaming, and trying to make my boys clean up their toys. Ahhh the joys of motherhood. :-)

P.S. And for anyone out there who has not heard of Manic Mommies, they are a fantastic podcast you can find on Itunes. They are 2 suburban moms talking about their daily struggles with their young kids and lots of other stuff too (husbands, work, and interviews). They are wonderfully funny, and speak to the reality of parenting in a way that makes me not feel so alone sometimes. I would definitly recommend them. They also have a website at http://www.manicmommies.com/.

Mommy Guilt

Ok, so I feel really bad. Alex has had his camp this week and almost every morning he has faught me. I mean screaming, crying, saying "mommy I'm scared" and "Don't leave me!". But I have held firm and made him go, sometimes even leaving him crying. I have talked to the teacher and she said each day he is upset for like a minute after I leave and then he is all into it and smiles and giggles. And every day I pick him up he is all happy and enjoying himself. But still, every morning I do the debate, do I take him home or make him go? I wanted him to do this camp to have fun and get used to getting up and being active in the morning since his preschool is in the morning next year. But I have been shocked by his reactions, he had absolutely no problem in preschool all last year, he always went running off into class, even from the first day. So, I am not sure why he is having such a hard time with this. It is in the same place he went to school, with a teacher he has had before, doing things he has done before... so I am stumped.

But dealing with this I have also come up with a new reason I want him to go every morning. What message would I be sending to him if, at the first sign of discomfort I let him bail out. I was always a VERY shy kid, I got very nervous when I had to go somewhere new or have a new experience. But, what helped me was beign forced, or forcing myself out of my comfort zone. Because, then once I had accomplished it I knew I could do more than I had previously thought and the next time it wasn't so bad. For example, in high school I was in Chorus, I loved it, but always stood in the background. Then finally my junior year I decided I was going to perform in the Cafe Musique revue our Choir put on every year. I can not tell you how terrified I was, I was almost sick. But I forced myself to do it and I felt so amazing about myself after the fact, I knew I could do anything after that. I guess I just want Alex to feel the same way, for him to know that though he was scared and nervous, he did it, and he did it on his own.

I just hope that is the case, and that I am not scaring him for life. LOL.

Little Ninjas Summer Camp

This week Alex is going to camp for the first time. Of course it is only one week, 9-12 in the morning, but still, it is technically call camp. :-) But anyway, it is run by Jefferson County Parks and Rec, and the one he is doing is martial arts themed. It is with the same woman who taught the little Karate class Alex took a few months ago, and he loved that so I figured he would like this. Yesterday was his first day of camp, and he said he had fun, except that he would not tell me a darn thing that he did. The answer to every question was "nothing", ok I thought that started when he was like 14, not 4!! Oh well, at least he said he wanted to go back today and that is something. :-) It has also been my first experience 'packing a lunch' for him. It sounds silly but I actually almost teared up doing it the other night, to think my baby boy is old enough for me to be packing his lunch! Yeah, I am esily amused these days. LOL.

My goal with all these martial arts classes if for him to get an interest in it and eventually sign him up for formal classes through an academy. I think martial arts is fantastic, not only is it exercise but it builds selfesteem, respect, and will hopefully give him a focus as he grows up. But who knows, I won't force it down his throat, if he ends up not liking it then we will try something else.

First Day at the Pool

This wednesday we went down and visited my mom and went to the pool at her apartment complex. We all had a ton of fun! The kids were all very good and had a ball. Mackenzie didn't really want to spend any time in the pool, but was happy to wander around and explore.



Mackenzie in her swim shirt from last year, I hadn't yet bought her new bathing suit. Hence her belly sticking out. Oh well, luckily I don't think she cared. LOL

My Mom and the boys in the kiddy pool splashing.

And of course Kenzie again, this time she was happy to just sit in her stroller and watch the fun.

Father and Daughter

Everyone told him it would happen, but I think Timm now sees it for himself, Mackenzie has him wrapped around her little finger and is not letting go. Of course he loves our boys just as much, but there is just something so special about his and Mackenzie's relationship. He has endless patience for her and everynight has to go into he room and lay with her (one night he even fell asleep in there for a few hours). And that little girl just squeels and giggles whenever he is around. Mommy may have been her first word, but she is totally a Daddy's girl. :-)




Our sweet little girl, after a yummy run in with a pudding cup. :-)

And of course, Father and Daughter. How blessed I am. :-)

A Hot Busy Weekend

Well, it feels like summer is finally here. It has been hotter than hades for the last several days, and of course we chose now to start ripping down our old, crappy deck to make room for our newer better one. Luckily we were blessed enough to have a bunch of help saturday and sunday. A few of our friends have decided to have "work parties" at each other's houses, so we had a few of them up on saturday and then sunday my brother and his fiance (who are getting married at our 'farm' on July 4th) came up to help some more. So between everyone we managed to get all the demolition done that was needed and I built a play house for the kids (I just enclosed the space under their playset and put in a floor) and built them a sandbox using left over boards that came off the old deck. And I am proud to say that I did most of the work on those things, measuring, cutting, and nailing the boards. Considering how suburban I typically am, it was a stretch for me. :-) The kids also were very busy, the boys were outside just about all day friday through sunday and played their little hearts out. And Mackenzie spent a few hours outside too, she is so fair skined though I kept her in more to prevent her getting too much sun.

So, in the end it was a very productive, busy, sweaty, sunburn inducing weekend. :-D Happy Monday everyone!!